At some point in every relationship, whether it’s with friends, family, or a partner, there comes a moment when words don’t seem to matter anymore. It’s not that you have nothing left to say, but sometimes talking doesn’t change anything. I’ve never been the type to make a big scene when things end. No long speeches, no dramatic goodbyes. I’d rather have one honest conversation than drag things out. That last talk isn’t about blaming or winning, it’s about figuring out if there’s still a way forward. It brings clarity to where things stand.
Relationships have their own pace, and sometimes, they naturally run their course. Eventually, you realize that saying “let’s talk about this” over and over doesn’t help if nothing changes. What matters isn’t how much you talk, but whether you’re being heard. That’s the difference between communication and comprehension.
As I get older, I’ve noticed that communication is more complicated than I used to think. People use the word “communication” as a buzzword. I’ve grown tired of this notion. Truly, just talking isn’t enough; you need real understanding, which a lot of people miss. I feel that it’s easier for people to simply avoid or disappear from connection with others. Every relationship can’t always be joyful. There is destined to be something that another individual will express disagreement or aversion to. The matter lies in whether that is a dealbreaker to terminate the connection. Connections have become mediocre for some reason. It’s as if many are entangled with the illusion of TikTok relationships.
Numerous connections are turning bitter due to the absence of understanding or even the willingness to comprehend. Clarity is scarce these days. There are a plethora of superficial connections forming that lack any cohesion. Perhaps it’s just me, but I perceive this as the reason why relationships are not being preserved or mended. They ultimately diminish because of the struggle to understand one another. My therapist would say many individuals are becoming self-focused. I appreciate when she presents this perspective because it prompts me to reflect that if everyone is becoming self-focused, then where does that leave relationships to develop?
If we are perpetually consumed by our own emotions, when will individuals attune to others' feelings? I am not attempting to speak out of context, but we are advancing at a swift pace towards aspiring to superficial connections. That’s why it’s starting to appear that relationships are losing significance. No one is engaging in sincere conversations, even when they are uncomfortable, and demonstrating genuine care and authenticity. Some individuals don’t resonate with that idea, and that’s perfectly fine. The crux is that many connections are concluding due to avoidant behaviors or overly idealistic views about relationships. The moment you disagree with someone, it morphs into cancel culture.
Sometimes I ponder if I feel too intensely or articulate myself excessively. I desire individuals to understand where I stand in my connections. If I’ve upset someone, I hope they’ll inform me. I strive to create an environment that is comfortable and secure so that the people I cherish can communicate with me if I’ve committed a misstep or if something is troubling them. I believe that’s essential in any connection. I don’t want friends, partners, or family to shy away from me. I’d prefer to know what transpired so I can attempt to rectify it or allow them to see my actions moving forward. I seek transparency, so we can have durability in the connection. Some might say I fall somewhere on the spectrum of a secure attachment style. But without the labels, it’s really just this—I want reciprocity with the people I care for. That’s how we water and nourish our relationships.
Maybe I care too much, but holding onto negative feelings about someone I care about just doesn’t feel right. Context matters. No one can read minds. We can’t expect others to know what we’re thinking or fix things we never talk about. It takes both communication and understanding to make relationships last. Right? Or am I missing something?
One thing I’ve discovered with relationship conclusions is that the medium of text messages, you can’t engage in serious discussions over text. It never appears to turn out well. I had one instance where a challenging dialogue over text rendered a relationship remote, and I’ve gained insight from that. Now, I won’t have profound conversations about conflicts through messages. When situations become strained, I believe it’s preferable to converse in person or at least over the phone, so you can hear and see one another. You observe the subtle nuances that words alone can’t convey.
But it’s not just the hard conversations that matter; it’s what happens afterward. You have to ask yourself if things are moving toward healing or if silence becomes the new normal. In the end, there are only two choices either you both try harder, or you both stop trying.
These are just my thoughts on having tough talks with people you care about. Everyone goes through this at some point. When relationships are tested, it makes you think about how much they mean to you.
As we get older, relationships get more complicated and need more care. It’s like taking care of plants. If you don’t water them, they’ll eventually die. Plants don’t die right away when you stop caring for them; it takes time to notice they’re being neglected. Relationships are the same. If you only put in half the effort, they slowly fade because you forget to nurture them. Days turn into weeks, weeks into months, and months into years. Then one day, you realize the relationship is gone and can’t be fixed.
At times, I desire that we could return to when cherishing one another as companions or relatives seemed effortless. Existence once appeared more manageable, yet now it appears as though we’re perpetually striving to maintain momentum, without pausing to savor it. There are countless shallow connections that lack substance.
Until Next Time,
Trinity 💛
From personal experience, I can say that I have had relationships that ended in a blessing. And to this day, I am the happiest person. When a relationship doesn't work, it's better to let it go.
The title of this topic had me appealed.
Effective commuincation is key.
Most people pretend to listen but fail to understand.
With the rise of technology over the last 20 years, effective commuincation is fading away in the shadow of mobile phones.
Some of us can type paragraphs within minutes in, but in person n hour can pass and yet you can barely get five words out of the person.
You shinned on a common issue and most of all, even with effective communicationand understanding, some relationships are not meant to be and that's okay because two good hearts doesn't gurantee everlasting love.